Monday, September 28, 2015

Pumping Update - Pumpdate, If You Will

So, just a quick post to update on the pumping issue from work. It actually got resolved that same afternoon but time to update about it has been hard to come by.

I don't know if I mentioned this or not but I sort of figured that the pressure was coming from someone other than my boss and he was just the messenger. He is actually a very understanding boss when it comes to anything family related as he has two small children of his own and he's a very involved dad - often leaving early to attend soccer practice or dance class or whatever. So, at the end of the day when he was finally free of meetings he and I got a chance to chat. He never replied because he very clearly read my hostility in my reply to him and instead of risking another incident where tone could be misinterpreted wanted to talk in person. At the beginning of our chat he said "I detected some hostility with your reply." This was the actual reply, so, not unprofessional or anything - just short and sweet and apparently did a good job of getting my point across:

I really don’t know how long. If the space is in such high demand they can find me another spot. It could be another month, it could be another 6 months. It’s up to Laney.
So I told him that yes, that hostility was intentional and was directed at whomever keeps asking for the space. He was super grateful we decided to chat in person instead of continuing with email. Ha!

As I suspected, he WAS just the messenger for whomever is pushing to get this room. While I think he should have pushed back himself while not checking with me again, that's neither here nor there at this point. As for asking again so soon after he asked the first time, he said he mis-remembered what I said before and thought he remembered me saying I would not need it for much longer. I did tell him in that first chat that I only pumped 6 months with Charley (but I went on to say that's not to say Laney will be on the same schedule so it could be months longer than that) so I guess he could have only heard that first part of that and tuned out the rest. Regardless, he definitely sees it now and I highly doubt another word will be muttered about it until I am the one telling them I'm done using it.

He agreed that there really isn't another place to put me and that "they" (such a secret about who is wanting to move in here!) were just going to have to find another solution to their space dilemma. He also didn't know anything about the incident last week where people used the room as a conference room without checking with me so we both agreed his email ended up being more of a straw that broke the camel's back and that it wasn't all his fault. We went on to talk about how tough it is to put your foot down and carve out space for your family sometimes and he commiserated that it is even tough for him in different scenarios because most of the other executives aren't as involved with their children or don't have children.

Anyways, it all came out just fine and was a happy chat. That's not to say I didn't shed a tear or two, because, well, because I'm me, but all that matters is that I am happy with the outcome and I highly doubt anyone will say a word to me about it any longer.

The next morning he called me back in his office to triple check that he and I were good. I assured him we were good. We're good. Laney's good. Pumping is ::saying this through gritted teeth:: good.



Jessica said...

Oh my goodness - those conversations are so hard! I'm glad it went well and that it's over :) Hopefully you won't have to keep going over it!

The Mrs./The Mom said...

I'm glad this turned out positive. I intended to send my words of encouragement on your last post but cant comment from my phone. Either way-hang in there! I know it isn't easy but its worth it!

Laura Diniwilk said...

I'm glad that it got resolved but seriously annoyed by his use of hostility. Preserving your LEGAL right to a place to have a place to pump is not being hostile. What's next, is he going to ask if you're on your period or something? (Sorry I'm such a sassypants, BF issues get me ALL RILED UP.)