Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Things That Only Happen To Me



Scene: New Job; Orientation with 9 other new people and 2 people from HR.
Situation: It's one of those go around the table and state your name and your title deals (which I hate, btw) but at least it's an easy answer and not like "name one interesting thing about yourself, which undoubtedly came up at a later point in orientation. Argh.

Anyways, besides the 2 HR girls, I'm the only other female there. New job is in a primarily male dominated industry besides the accounting/administrative positions. So, it's my turn and I say "I'm Lacey MAIDENNAME, err, ahh, I mean MARRIEDNAME, as I blush. I've only been married 5 years so I'm still a rookie in using my married last name and it's totally understandable, right? Heh. ONLY ME.

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Scene: New Job, heading to lunch with my boss, walking out to the car
Situation: We've been working all day with minimal breaks and it's really a late lunch. We immediately start talking about our families or whatever else is NOT work related to give our minds a break. He is telling me about a long snake skin he found at his house and me, staying on the subject of snakes, tell him that even though our new house is in the woods we have yet to see even a single snake in the year we've lived there. I even follow up with "yeah, and now that I say that they are going to be falling out of the trees on me ::shiver:: this evening while we are outside.

We go to lunch and come back and on our walk back inside on the sidewalk leading up to the building, I nearly step on WHAT I THOUGHT WAS a very long dried up worm, but WHAT I QUICKLY REALIZED was a smaller (12" or so! which isn't all that small!) snake as it stuck it's terrifyingly disgusting tongue out at me. I screamed "I KNEW IT!" I knew I'd see one today since I said that earlier. New boss shuffled the snake along to the grass and just laughed. Ew ew ew. ONLY ME.

For obvious reasons, this story deserves NO PICTURES.

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Scene: Friday night on solo parenting duty. Around Charley's bedtime when I realize I'm tired too.
Situation: Charley and I are planning on going to yard sales in the morning so instead of being lax about the weekend bedtime like I usually am, I'm trying to stick with normal and get her to bed at a decent time. Suddenly I come up with a great idea to get her excited to go to bed on time! "Charley! How about you can sleep with Mama in my bed tonight since Daddy won't be home?" She seems excited about it and we get ready for bed right then. I'll be honest that I'm a little excited for some snuggles from my almost three year old too.

We get in bed and Charley does some really sweet things like holding my hand and asking me to keep my arm across her back. Eventually she gets wiggly and at one point starts pretending and politely whispering a story to her stuffed animals. Not too much later she starts thrashing her head back and forth on her pillow and it's clear that kiddo can't sleep. After a combined 30-45 minutes of all of that, Charley really sweetly asks "Mama, can I please sleep in my bed tonight?" What?! Was she just doing this to appease her ol' ma? I can't believe I was worried that I may create a bad habit and it's my kid that basically tells me this isn't a good idea. I take her to her bed and she's asleep within 15 minutes or so. Only my kid would be given permission to bed share and would politely decline it. 

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I swear I have these "only me" moments all of the time. If there's a way to embarrass yourself, be completely clumsy, or jinx myself, I will find a way to do it. It's kind of like my superpower so I guess I should go ahead and own it.

2 comments:

Jessica said...

That is so cute! I need my own space to sleep, too, Charley.

diana bowers said...

Hah, only Charley would say she needs her own space. So much for spoiling her by sharing a bed.