Monday, July 11, 2011

Attention to Detail

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I'm really into crime shows. If one of my reality shows isn't on, or I've caught up on all of the good stuff in my DVR list, I'm typically channel surfing looking for a crime show like Forensic Files, The First 48, or even just an episode of Dateline. John is a fan too. Besides HGTV, crime shows are the only shows on TV that we can watch together.

Also I should mention that for a brief semester in college, I switched majors to Criminal Justice. I started out as an Accounting major, then decided that was too hard and switched to Finance. So when I was a Finance major, I had to take more Finance classes and less Accounting classes. So my first semester as a Finance major I took Finance 101 (or whatever it was called but basically Finance I) and didn't do so well in it. Partly because I was not focused and skipping classes and partly because I didn't like it. So then I scrapped the whole thing and switched to Criminal Justice because I did love me some crime shows. [If that isn't the dumbest reasoning ever. I also like watching So You Think You Can Dance on TV so does that mean I should have gone to school to be a dancer or choreographer? Um heck no. Have you seen me dance??] Oh, and for an ending to the college story, I eventually screwed my head back on right and switched back to Accounting where I belonged and finished it out.

[Why did I feel the need to share that again? Anyways...]

So, as I'm watching these crime shows, I like to put myself in the shoes of the witnesses. I think to myself, "Man, I'd be such a good witness because I pay so much attention to mindless detail! The investigators would love me!" and things like that. & no, I don't have any trouble carrying my head around each day.

But today on my drive home (where I do my best thinking) I start to consider what I may give police or investigators if I needed to be a witness to something. & I come up with something like this:

Officer: Ma'am can you give me a description of the vehicle?

Me: Of course! It was a darker color, larger-ish car. But, the one thing I really remember about it was that it had a bumper sticker on the back and it was way crooked. I mean, why even put a bumper sticker on your car in the first place, and if you do, are you really going to leave it on there if it's crooked? Oh, and I'm really good with numbers and the license plate had at least one 3 in it.

Officer: Okayyyy. Um, thank you for your description of the car. What about the offender. Do you have a description of him?

Me: Oh you bet! It was a man, pretty tall, lighter-ish skin. Don't ask me his race or weight. But what I did notice was that he was wearing corduroy pants and it's flipping 95 degrees today! Who wears corduroys in the summer! And also his hair was a mess. It was like he was trying to do the messy-chic and ended up with nothing more than bed head instead.

Because, while I may pay a great attention to detail, it's probably not the details that are important. So  the sketch of the perpetrator that they would release to the public based on my [most excellent]description would be this:

perpetrator

And the sketch of the getaway car would be this:
getaway car

So basically, it's a good thing I ended up in Accounting.
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2 comments:

MillerMama said...

I regularly memorize license plates of cars I think look like they're doing something shady just in case I need to report them to police later. *blushy face*

lifeofadoctorswife said...

This is hilarious. Especially because I ALSO love crime shows (although the fictional ones - you know, CSI types) and because I ALSO imagine myself as good with details. But I would definitely focus on the details you do. Why would someone put a bumper sticker on crooked?