Friday, May 29, 2009

Oh poop, it's Friday

I know I'm posting this early in the morning, perhaps you should eat your breakfast before reading...

I'm glad it's Friday, but this morning didn't start off so well.

I stepped in poop.

And you are thinking, "ohhh I hate when that happens to me!"

Once, on the way to the bus stop when I was little, I stepped in the most massive pile of dog poop ever. I didn't realize it until I was sitting in my seat on the bus, the seat with the wheel hump, and I smelled something rank coming from my feet. I saw the poop all over the bottom of my shoe and decided to wipe the poop off on the wheel hump under my feet. I then decided to switch seats so no one knew I was the pooperator.

Then, as each kid got on the bus it was a "EWWW who farted!?! Grosssssssssss!" And all the windows were put down and we stuck our heads out of the windows to breathe. I participated in the ewwwss and grossssssssssses to conceal my guiltiness. When I got back on the bus that afternoon, the bus driver took me aside and said "Lacey, why did you wipe that poop all over my bus floor?" and I said "I didn't! No way it wasn't me!", but I'm pretty sure she saw through my lies.

So yeah, that was bad. But I don't think you realize the extremity of my poop stepping this morning.

You see, Tuna from time to time has to have his hair trimmed around his booty area. If we do not, an occasional turd (sorry Mama, I know you hate the word "turd"...TURD TURD TURD!) will get stuck in his hair which he can carry to wherever he pleases. I'm pretty sure this is called a "dingleberry". Well, said dingleberry decided to fall off on our stairs at some point last night or this morning. Poop, if you don't know, is brown in color, and if you recall, our stairs have been stained and are no longer carpet. Therefore our stairs are also brown in color. Brown poop on brown stairs in the dark turns out to be hard to see.

But not to worry, you may not be able to see it, but you can definitely feel it squish on the bottom of your bare foot as you step in it.

Guess what we'll be doing this weekend? Shaving a kitty butt!

Happy Friday!


Kathleen said...

Gross! And to think I read this after you already stepped your little poop filled feet in my cube today.

Joy said...

Holy Cow, I laughed out loud at the school bus story!! How did the bus driver know you did it? Well it must be a trend in the Barnes family to have pets that leave poop on the stairs because Ruby if we don't let her out with 10 minutes of her dinner and we are upstairs, she will poop ON the stairs! I have yet to witness her doing it, just cleaned up the mess!!! ARGHHH!!! I HATE poop!! :-)